A friendlier insect repellent

Mosquito larvae. Exaggeratedly green water.

When I lived in Tennessee, I would do anything for an effectual insect repellent: from saturating my skin with toxic sprays to living my summers with a box fan on the upstairs porch, above the supposed mosquito line. I never thought to attack the mosquitoes on their turf, in their home.

Evidently, scientists have identified chemicals called kairomones that cause mosquitoes to lay fewer eggs.

"These chemicals could be a useful part of a strategy to control the population size of mosquitoes,” says lead researcher Joel E. Cohen. In nature, the chemical, which is transmitted through the air by mosquitoes predators such as the backswimmer, alerts the tiny annoying pest that it's ferocious enemies are near. Perhaps the mosquito doesn't want to risk making babies amidst such turmoil, and so it doesn't.

The result? Less mosquitoes in the pool. Less mosquitoes in your backyard. Less irritatingly itchy bites all summer.

So....all you have to do is spray this (soon to be developed?) mist containing kairomones into any potential mosquito habitat and you're done. Ha! You make my home smell perpetually like citronella and my arms smell like sour weeds--I make your home-puddle smell like predators. I win.

But, wait--how do you find a mosquito breeding ground? I know they lay eggs in standing water, so if you have a small pond, a birdbath, or a water-collecting divot in your yard, you know exactly where to attack. But, what if your yard, like the yard of the 2 story Victorian house i rented for college with its unruly trees, overgrown grass and bushes, and heaping compost bin, was a little more ambiguous? Where do you attack?

There must have been a pretty serious mosquito den underneath the front porch of that 100 year old house. My friends and I were limited to 20 minute gin rummy games out there all summer--as soon as we got our 20th mosquito bite, we called the winner. We could've used some some super mosquito repellent under there. (Also, mosquitoes are attracted to skin of someone who has been drinking beer, but that's another issue entirely.)

Apart from mapping your frequency of bites onto your square footage, there are a few places you can always be wary of:

• Beside any board or fence in your yard
• Empty planters, cups, or concave toys left in your yard 
• Against the house
• Below leakey faucets
• In gutters

Friends still in Tennessee, take heed of this advice. I've gotta say, the more and more I talk about mosquitoes and remember all the trouble they caused, the happier and happier I am to be sitting outside at a coffee shop right now--on ground level, in summer--and not be bothered by such pests. California is the life.